Sacrifice

 O my god her smile is still the same, as before . She looks so elegant on black floral dress. Her hair style, her personality is still the same like 10 years ago. We've known each other since we were in 4th grade. After having Aniket she didn’t even change a bit in her looks and behaviour, always smiling. We were in the lounge area waiting for our flight to Mumbai from Bangalore. I was having my masala dosa and coffee and as always she was having her favourite Masala chai and crumbled egg with toast. Before our marriage whenever we met in the morning she always used to have the same breakfast and said, “I will say this in my breakfast for the rest of my life, I will never be bored.  As you never get bored of having masala dosa and coffee.” We were chuckling, “Like we are never bored with each other and will never be. You are my Masala Chai.” And she started giving her lovely smile. Whole time Aniket did not sit at one place even once, the whole time he was just running after Maya.  I was watching them silently. Whenever Maya and I used to talk about marriage, we knew that my family members would never agree. Still, with a hope, she used to ask me, at least try to make them understand once. Maybe they will agree for us. My heart used to break telling her that they will not agree, we are from a poor family, we have a simple life and they want a simple girl. They want such a girl who does not know anything in the world, she just knows how to oversee her house and her spouse. Since my mother was moreover like this and her mother was moreover like that for whom family and children matter. And you are an ambitious and independent girl who walks shoulder to shoulder with men.  And that's what I like about you. And it is not that I have not explained this thing to them.  But their words are also sometimes correct that the situation and background they are from. On the off chance that there's a young lady lying in that environment at that point it is affirming for them since she will get them way better and will be able to adjust. And it'll not stay in their intellect that since of their living conditions or because of any condition, she has got to endure or adjust”. She began looking at me in outrage and said, “this isn't what they are saying, these are your words.” I looked at her with nervousness and after that bowed my eyes and said yes, these are my words.” “I don’t need you to sacrifice your dreams and your life for me “I can feel my whole body start to shake with the sobs. I have no idea how bad I’m hurt, but I don’t even care. No physical pain could even compare to what my heart is feeling at this moment. But that day, She got up and said “ fine if this is what you want then we are done!  indirectly you are breaking up with me right?  So yes we are done! “My heart started beating fast. ``But listen, What you are thinking is wrong, I can change their thinking, I will take care of them with my love. But you are neither giving them nor me a chance to explain our point of view.  I don't know why you are doing this, but you will regret this whole life.”  She left but I was crying sitting there. What should I do? My parents had asked me only one thing in my life that I should marry the girl of their choice. They fulfilled my dream of becoming an engineer even in such a poor condition.  And when it was my turn to fulfil their  dream, how could I refuse. I know that Maya will sacrifice all her dreams and desires for me and my family.But how could I be so selfish, when I can't avoid what my parents say, So for how can I let her ignore the hard work of her parents. I know I was right but somewhere deep inside I also know that I am wrong also, I betrayed her love. But when I am seeing Maya before me giggling and getting a charge out of each minute with Aniket I feel more than upbeat. Aniket is presently 4 years old and exceptionally plump and naughty. He did not indeed halt for a minute to conversation all the time he was like mumma when will we get on the plane? Mumma, what are we going to eat there? Mumma I need this I need that? And with so much ease and love she was answering all his silly questions. I love to see them like this. As boarding begun we got up and headed towards que. maya told Aniket, hey hold Daddy’s hand” and he ran towards “Nikhil” he picked him up and begun kissing him all over his face and he was giggling. When Maya stood behind Nikhil, he put Maya before him and said after you mam, always. And kissed her temple. It had been 5 years since our breakup and Maya's marriage. But I was upbeat that she got the life she deserves and is cheerful. She is a well known writer and Nikhil is an investment banker. Both are idealize for each other. My heart is soothed to listen the news of her success on social media. Yes, indeed in spite of the fact that I have been hitched for 4 years. But never got her out of head as well as heart. And she was right, my entire life I have a regret that I never had her in my life.

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